The Planeswalker's Matrix

2008-12-14T19:34:00.003+08:00

This might probably be my last post. I was planning some time ago to make a new blog.

Today I say goodbye to a dear friend of mine. His ex-girlfriend is making a sketchbook for him, so here I am, writing a short entry for him.

I have known Lloyd since my poly days, and I am glad to have been his best friend for these four years. He was always so reliable, and he would be the first one I sought whenever I had a problem or wanted to do something out of the blue –example: jogging, gaming, movies. He was talented and smart unlike me. If there were some aspects we shared, we were both introverted and homely.

If I had something to complain about him, it was about his air of melancholy and pessimistic thinking. He often felt life-weary. But as time passed, he gradually grew out of it – possibly infected by my cheerfulness. And yes, he often complain how fat he was. Or claim how good-looking he was (how delusional!)
That I guess, didn’t change until the day he left this world.

At the end of the year 2005, I brought him on a trip on Star Virgo. It’s a pity that we didn’t bring a digital camera along, but it was a fun experience. (I am still impressed how he could store his shit for three days even with a diet of six meals a day.)

After our poly days, we still keep close contact, often chatting online or meeting up regularly even while we were serving our national service. The last time we met up was on November 23. I was supposed to meet him on the day he collected his brand new second-hand motorcycle(sounds contradicting), but I couldn’t make it as I was supposed to be resting at home.

And just like that, he left this world...

It’s been a good four years. He would often advice me to work harder for my future but I was too lazy, too playful. But from now, I would start working harder even if it’s just a little. As we moved on with life, as the days may pass, I will forget his gestures or how he sounded like. But I will never forget I once had a buddy, a best friend named Lloyd.

To the Lord who took you away so suddenly, grant him eternal rest.

2008-10-19T18:03:00.002+08:00

Some background snippets I wrote for Von Nesardo Triumphant.

Lucifer, the greatest of all seraphim, entered the Etemenanki.

Without meeting The Creator’s gaze, Lucifer genuflected. “My Lord, I answer your summon.”

“Rise, my most beloved child. Come sit with me.”

Lucifer raised his head reverently. With all of The Creator’s angels resplendent in their shining armours and pristine white plumage. One would imagine The Creator as the most beautiful-looking, most perfect being.

But he wasn’t. He took the appearance of a plain, middle-aged man with greying hair and beard. He gave a fatherly smile.

“Lucifer, do you love me?” He asked.

“You know I do, my Lord. I love you with all my heart and soul, every fibre of my being.” The seraphim answered. Lucifer met His eyes and shivered. The Creator’s all-knowing gaze pierced through every veils, staring deep into his very soul. The Creator was pleased.

“Your twin brother gave the identical answer. Lucifer, I have a task for you.”

“I am yours to command, O Lord.”

Etemenanki was washed away, to be replaced by plane of nothingness. And the Creator told the seraphim His plan.

Lucifer slumped to his knees, astounded at the revelations. “I cannot live without you, O Lord. I cannot.”

“It is difficult. But if it’s you, I believe you can make it.”
- - - - -

I had been in His presence that fateful day. It was like a flash of insight, in which everything that had happened all seemed to make sense.

I cannot say that I fully understand His plan, for I never will. But for that one moment, I saw the picture, where all of the pieces in the puzzle fitted perfectly. It was like the climax of an orchestra, where hundreds of angels each playing their instrument together to make one beautiful sweeping sound. It was a rush of euphoria, a wave that engulfed the being, and made me believe there was a purpose in His plan.

That moment was ages ago. Yet it still feels like I have not lived a day past it.

Now, everything is different; there is a new life to live.

- - - - -

Leliel, angel of death and night, watched her father wept to himself. It was an alien action to her. She will remember Lucifer as the greatest and the most beautiful angel, the first to rebel against God.

But most importantly, she’ll always remember Lucifer as the first angel to shed tears.

2008-09-30T18:12:00.002+08:00

We witness the end of two epic series this season.

Code Geass R2 and Macross Frontier.

Now, I lost another purpose in my life, in my book-outs.

If you watch anime and haven't heard of this two series, please stop living under the rock you had been hiding under all this while.

2008-08-24T19:05:00.002+08:00

Army Half-Marathon today. The morning weather was good, and there were a surprising amount of young ladies there - perhaps I should join more marathons. All was good except for the fact I was running with a filled bladder. But then, I did not bad, with a last 100M sprint to the finish line. Heck, 10km wasn't even warm-up.

There were this group wearing this singlet with the slogan behind, 'Jesus loves you.'

Yeah, I think I should make one for myself as well. 'If you see these words shrinking. It's only natural.'

- - - - -

Fried rice is one of the easiest dish to cook, and can serve in large quantities. Let me share the ingredients to a hax0rz fried rice.

Rice. (duh...)
Eggs. (okayyy...)
Luncheon meat. (I know this is unhealthy.)
Corn. (sweetness.)
fried chilli shrimps. (you know, the one found in kangkong?)
Cubed potatoes (urgh more carbos, but they add texture)

A dash of spring onions or seaweed.

2008-08-16T19:00:00.003+08:00

At church, I was standing at the usual spot, awaiting mass until the guy standing beside moved away. It was then I realized I was standing beside Pierre Png with his wife, Andrea. Ummm okay, my sis claims he's handsome. But of course we all know why he moved away from me - he's being intimidated.

All his looks pale before mine...

And, I think I stood beside Sister Joanna a teacher who once taught me catechism when I was primary 1-3. Amazing how I remembered what she said or taught me till this very day. Sometimes, I wondered if my ex-students actually remember who I am. But then again, I don't think she recognize me. It had been 13 years.

That innocent, young boy had grown to become a strong, handsome, passionate and innocent young man.

(Okay, ignore my mindless rambling.)

- - -

A passage ripped from chapter 2 of Yume... my own writings, of course. Yume means dreams in Japanese language.

Through the blind corridors, dream travellers wander to worlds of every kind, all versions of our own fundamental reality, sometimes known as parallel universes or alternate timelines.

Some worlds are substantial and some incorporeal; others inchoate, traces of unborn realms and dying planes. All of them given existence from our sentience and dreams.

Each reality is but a dream of another, and each dreamer, perhaps, a god unknowing. Would the universes exist beyond our dreams? If we stopped dreaming, would they fade into nothing? And, would we fade along with them?

2008-08-10T11:44:00.003+08:00

While you people were enjoying your National day, I was protecting the President and the Republic of Singapore. Okay, that sounds a bit too much.

A day where Singaporeans become patriotic for only one day. Do your heart swell with pride when you see Armed forces march in the parade? We should be proud of our own army.

Soldiers are always complaining how fucked up the SAF is. I have to admit, hell yeah it is. The SAF is far far away from perfect, but as long as we are better than our *ahem* neigbours, it is more than enough.

Then again, as time passes, the standard of our soldiers produced are becoming pansier. Watch how North Korean soldiers fight. Ruthless aggression and unwavering loyalty. Confirm eat us for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

- - -

I don't know why sometimes when I say something patriotic, it often make my fellow comrades explode in laughter. Here's some examples.

- - -

Private Matt: Eh sergeant, how come you run SOC so fast?

SGT Clement: That's because everytime I look at my rifle, I am reminded of the sacred responsibility of protecting my country. This forces me to push myself to do my best, knowing that this little bit of fitness can determine the survival of my section.

Private Matt: LOLOL, wah lau you so slack you expect me to believe you. I might understand if you say you have good lungs or something.

- - -

Private Matt: You didn't want to go Signals? Where did you wanted to go?

SGT Clement: Tekong definitely. I want to inspire my recruits.

Private Matt: Like how?

SGT Clement: Hmm, like in field camp. The mud of my face is the soil of my homeland SINGAPORE! In this land we are made, in this land we will FIGHHHHHT!!

Private Matt: FUCK YOU!!

SGT Clement: Okay maybe not like that. More like... knock it down, recover, knock it down, recover, crunches position change, run to that tree and come back. Whole lot change to your long four fall in five minutes.

Private Matt: Lucky you never go Tekong.

2008-07-27T11:48:00.002+08:00

If there is still anyone reading my blog, I apologize for the lack of updates. I do have a lot to blog about actually, just that laziness and the lack of time had hindered me so. (Excuses only...)

And I won't be updating any time soon.

But anyway, I am thinking of creating a new blog, not on blogger blogspot definitely. I choose WordPress! Not only it looks more professional, I could actually catergorize my stuff with it. Its main purpose is to store or showcase some of my writings -be it fanfictions or original fictions- and herald a new dawn of new readers. I still suspect no one comes here anymore.

Until then,

His Excellency,
Clement

2008-06-28T22:16:00.002+08:00

Sometimes in church, you see little kids running around. Sometimes I just want to lift one of them up on my arms. Is that... my paternal instincts crying out?

I always find little girls age 4-5 adorable. After that, they all grow up and turn bitchy, whiny and stuff... like you people. Certainly prefer a daughter as girls are quieter compared to boisterous boys. But when they are older... omg, you know.

Moses claims if he had a daughter in the near future, he would name her 'Chloe'. A good name, more common in the European countries.

And speaking of Europe, a good bunkmate of mine is heading to UK to study a Degree in law after his ORD. I have plans of flying off with him for three weeks. From UK, I can actually get to France with a train ride of two hours I guess. See the world a bit, you know? Instead of being a frog in the well.

If I had a daughter, her chinese name would be either 'Yin hua'

Yin Hua means Sakura in english.

For a boy, it would be 'Yun'. Yun means Cloud.

Together with my last name, it would become Feng Yun! (yeah right, as if, different han yu pin yin lar.)

Best one I heard before...

Sirname is Huang. Chinese name is FeiHong. Pretty cool but what if he turned out to be some kind of loser?

2008-06-08T09:31:00.002+08:00

It's been two week since I was promoted to Sergeant. Nothing big compared to the rest who are comissioning this June as an officer.

I have been posted to 2 Signal BN - one of my dream units. Thank God for that. It's supposely much better than the hellish 3SIG. One moron actually went into depression because of that.

Will really miss my training days. It is indeed the most fun time of your army life. All the pranks we played on each other, all the lame jokes, all the things we've been through to get till this stage of our life.

Once again, I've been separated from my best army mate. Going through BMT, SISPEC, and SIGNALS together. Now, he had been posted to GUARDS - God bless him. I wouldn't mind going Guards as long as we are still in the same bunk - now that's really going through ALL THE SHIT together. Well, all he can do is carry my picture like some funeral sending-off when he route marches.

All the best to you - the one who made me strong.

And good luck to Moses who's currently doing re-BMT in Dragon company omgwtflol. A place for lard pots. I think you'll be one of the fittest there.

2008-05-11T00:19:00.003+08:00

Congratulations to dear Elaine Teo Yu Zhen on her long-awaited baptism. A long three years struggle against objecting parents, and after that was won, she had those boring and simple RCIA lessons.

Despite not showing it, I, of course was glad for her. Seeing her happy brings me joy almost as much... as much as picking up a 50cent coin on the road.

PS: baptism at Lady of Lourdes isn't interesting. Where's all the submerging the victim into water fully? Geez.

- - - - -

Went to RJC straight for Piano Pandomonium after Mass at LOL (Lady of Lourdes, get it? LOL?)

It was the first time seeing Jessica play the piano.

Her short, stylish hair...

Her delicate, soft facial features, accentuated with light make-up...

Her girlish, petite frame albeit finely muscled...

Her fingers steepling and dancing deftly on the piano keys...

She was radiant, I have to admit. A girl worlds apart from me. Heck, she even write stories better than me. Hello, winning a reader digest competition?

As I look back at myself, I am thinking how pathetic I truly am. I have nothing.

2008-05-01T13:55:00.002+08:00

Here's one damn interesting news.

-----

Singapore, Sunday, 27 April 2008

A secondary school boy of age 13 was raped by a gang of 5 girls aged 15 to 16 yesterday afternoon 26 April 2008 in the girls toilet of their school.

"They dragged me into the toilet, and pointed a penknife at me. They told me that if I shouted and got them into trouble they will cut me up. They then made me take off all my clothes. One of the girls kept watch at the door, and two others held my arms. They then took turns to perform oral sex on me."

As it was a Saturday, most of the school was empty as most of the students have left after their CCA events in the morning.

However that was not the end of the boy's ordeal, as they later pinned him down on the toilet floor and proceeded to have sex with him. According to the boy, they each had to do it ten times minimum.

"When they were done, they told me not to tell anyone, and that I was now under their protection. They just left me there on the floor."

The boy told his mother Mdm Lee (not her real name) as soon as he got home, who immediately contacted the school.

The school could not be contacted for more details at this point of time.

Early this morning 27 April 2008, all those involved in the earlier case of the 13 year old boy raped by 5 teenage girls were sent to Tan Tock Seng Hospital for a medical checkup accompanied by their parents. All of whom did not want to comment. It was noted that the girls did not look repentant at all for what they did and that they were rather hostile to the nursing staff.

One of them was overheard screaming vulgarities at one of the female doctors warning her that if she touched her private parts again she would pee on her face.

According to retired lawyer Alan Verchinco, all those involved were underage, thus their identities will definitely not be disclosed to the public.

"To tell you the truth such cases has indeed ever happened in Singapore before, but it is usually the other way around. I was really stunned when I heard about it. However if charged, the girls are expected to spend a maximum of 2 years in a government girls home located in Toa Payoh."

It is currently not known at this point if the five girls were part of a larger gang, or if this was their first victim that came forward.

-----

WOAH, what's wrong with the world now. Unlike that lucky fellow, I am a self-sacrificial person. They could have vent all their frustration on me and I would have kept silent. KYOOOUUUU!!!

2008-03-29T11:49:00.002+08:00

Three weeks now in Stagmont Camp. Eight more weeks till Sergeant Clement. Time crawls languidly in here. Everyday pass so painfully slow.

I am treating this bunk almost like my own house. I brought PSP, yoga mat and even *gasp* a bolster to camp.

Anyway, during a smoke break. I met a soon-to-be operator I knew in my secondary school days. And that little mongrel name is Lionel. If I become his Sergeant, I will make sure he suffers.

On a side note: There is a God after all. CLANNAD ~After Story is announced.

Clannad is one awesome anime.

KYOOOUUUUU!!!

2008-03-07T12:26:00.002+08:00

Hoho, I am done with my SISPEC Basic Section Leadership Course. A memorable and fun 10 weeks - not as enjoyable as BMT though.

By the grace of God, I have managed to escape the jaws of death - Guards Recon. That is the absolute worst place you can get in the entire SAF. Training that is worse than Commandos or OCS.

SIGNAL SPECIALIST UFOOO!

Other than novels and own-time training, I have plans to get a PSP. From what I heard, Signals is rather slack considering it's a combat vocation.
And I am together with my army best buddy! We've been together for six months, going through thick and thin, joys and sufferings, life and death. Okay maybe not the last part.

- - - - -

Sis managed to buy one kg of nuggets from this supplier that does Macdonalds. Wonder if they have beef patties. Then I can make my very own bacon and cheese double patty beef burgers with BBQ sauce teh lawl.

2008-02-29T09:00:00.002+08:00

I may not seem like it, but I believe I am suffering from some sort of mild depression.

Discontent. Something I could only dream of, but could never achieve or attain.

2008-02-16T21:05:00.002+08:00

Incredibly random post.

- Previously before CNY: Field camp 2

"After studying the map, I noticed that we are surrounded by graveyards. Loads of them."

Me: "We are like, sleeping twenty metres away from a banana tree. You know what that means?"
Faz: *whispers fearfully* Pontianak?
Me: Wrong. Bananas for snacks.

-Straight after CNY: Tekong Grand Slam

I would like to wish everyone a happy valentine day.
"Fuck off."
"Happy Valentine everyone."
"I am so happy to sleep with all of you guys on this special night."
"Oh wow thanks, same here."

"WILD BOAR ALERT! WILD BOAR ALERT!"
"Where and how big is it?"
"It's somewhere near section 3. The size of a cat."

...and the next thing we know, it soon turned to the size of a leopard, then the size of a human.

"I once saw a huge wild boar in my SIT test area. It was the size of a motorbike."
"Liar."
"Serious! It was at the height of a small scooter."
"Oh chey, I was thinking of a Harley Davidson."
"Of course not lar."

Oh, and I burned myself when the grenade popped right in front of me. Not a Fragmentation grenade of course, I wouldn't blogging if it was. A smoke grenade, but damn I didn't know it was so hot. It burned right through my gloves.

2008-02-04T22:12:00.000+08:00

A bit about my life.

I can start by telling you that I never enjoyed running. I was the type who never exercised, never played any form of sports... until I enlisted into the Army.

I remembered when I was 13, my 2.4km timing was once 16-17 mins and to my utmost chagrin, girls were running faster than me. It all changed when my dad told me that running was mind over matter, it's about not giving up. I listened to that advice. For the next 2.4km, I continued running onwards despite all the discomforts, cramps, and muscle aches. I managed to clock 12:30 which I felt satisfied. That was during my secondary two days. And proceeded to hit 11:10 when I was secondary four. That was like a four points out of five. How I did that still bamboozles me till this very day.

For roughly four years, I never ran again. (unless you are counting me chasing after buses) Okay fine, I did try running and was mocked by my other friends for going too slow.

Fast forward to the present, I am running 9:30. A timing that rivals the average Commandos, Guardsmen, and NSF Officers. A timing I once thought I would never achieve. A timing I am rather proud of, considering I don't exercise. Makes me wonder sometime how far I would be going if I had joined a vigorous and physically-taxing CCA. Of course, I am not stopping there. Dreams of breaking into the eight minutes range may soon become a reality.

In the end, I still dislike running - endurance training is bleah.

So, I shall end my post with some (obvious) pointers for running.

1) Never walk. If you do, it's over. You lost the battle against yourself.

2) Take in controlled breaths. Breath in, hold, and release. Slow your heartrate down.

3) Motivate yourself as you run. It's mental battle within yourself. You think fast runners don't feel tired ah?

4) Pick on someone you believe is shittier than you yet he/she doing better than you. As you continue running, start berating yourself. "Why the hell is that piece of shit running faster than me?" It gives you that spur, that raw emotional boost to push yourself onwards.

5) Enjoy running. (as if)

2008-01-20T12:49:00.000+08:00

Yes, I know I have been neglecting my blog. Haven't found the motivation to blog despite the many things I wish to put down into words.

It's going to be my fifth week in SISPEC. Life there is tiring. Sometimes I am having only four hours of sleep daily. And we have to study and take tests. Uh hello, since when did Army have to study one?

I am doing fine, of course. Not well though. But when you are navigating through the dark forest in the middle of a chilly night. The relentless torrential rain beating down on you while you trudge forward mindlessly in standard battle order and signal set. You start asking yourself, 'why the fuck am I doing this while your other friends are slacking off in their vocation.'

Military and Regimental Police, Medic, Technician, Clerk, Driver...

And they still got the balls to complain and whine. Wake up from your idea. We ARE in the Army. Suffering is part of our daily diet.

Let's pray that I will pass out smoothly and enter PTI - where the fittest reigns.

2007-12-30T12:59:00.000+08:00

Okay, it's only four days in SISPEC and I felt I've been there for two weeks. The time-table is tightly-packed and the training is much more tougher than BMT. Or maybe it's my company, because it's one of the worst ones out there. I mean come on, 4km RUN for 5BX morning exercise? WTF!

But the food in SISPEC is pretty good. Ice cream every other meal? Char siew pau, curry puff, and fish fillet for breakfast? Apple pie for supper? Maybe that's why...

That's why...

I have achieved my target of...

60KG!!!

Oh yes, how I long, I waited to finally reach that weight. And that four kg I gained in my NS days are pure muscles. My waist is still 27 inches, thank you very much.

-----

This is something I got from Moses's blog. It sounded accurate for him so I gave it a try. Well, I don't really agree with mine, I have always considered myself as an interdependent person and rather useless.

My life number is... 1!

Life Path:
The Life Path 1 drive in this life is characterized by individualist desires, independence, and the need for personal attainment. The purpose to be fulfilled on this Life Path is that of becoming independent. This is a two part learning process; first, you must learn to stand on your own two feet and learn not to depend on others. After you are indeed free and independent, you must learn to be a leader. Many of our Generals, corporate leaders, and political leaders are men and women having the Life Path number 1. The 1 always has the potential for greatness as a leader, but they may fail as a follower. Many 1's spend most of their lives shaking off their dependent side. When this happens, there is little time left for enjoying the rewards to be gained through independence. The individual with Life Path 1 has to overcome an environment in which it is very easy to be dependent, and difficult to be independent.

Positive traits:
A person with positive 1 traits abounds in creative inspiration, and possesses the enthusiasm and drive to accomplish a great deal. Your drive and potential for action comes directly from the enormous depth of strength you have. This is both the physical and inner varieties of strength. With this strength comes utter determination and the capability to lead. As a natural leader you have a flair for taking charge of any situation. Highly original, you may have talents as an inventor or innovator of some sort. In any work that you choose, your independent attitude can show through. You have very strong personal needs and desires, and you feel it is always necessary to follow your own convictions. You are ambitious, and either understand or must learn the need for aggressive action to promote yourself. Although you may hide the fact for social reasons, you are highly self-centered and demand to have your way in most circumstances.

Negative traits:
When the 1 Life Path person is not fully developed and expressing the negative side of this number, the demeanor may appear very dependent rather than independent. If you are expressing this negative trait of the number 1, you are likely to be very dissatisfied with your circumstances, and long for self-sufficiency. This is defined as the weak or dependent side of the negative 1 Life Path. On the strong side of this negative curve, the 1 energy can become too self-serving, selfish and egotistical. Over-confidence and impatience mark this individual.

2007-12-23T00:01:00.000+08:00

My next phase of my Army life. Expectedly, I went to a command school.

SISPEC: School of Infantry Specialist.

Or rather affectionately known as... Suffer In Silence Plus Extra Confinement.

Firstly, we will go through the general three months course(BSLC) before we are split up to different specialization. Be it combat engineer, artillery, signals, infantry blah blah blah.

Most likely, I'll be going to infantry where we fight the front and give our lives for our country. Oh right, that sucks.

Well, let's just hope I can get PTI. Heh.

2007-12-14T09:01:00.000+08:00

POP-masu!!!

This BMT phase had been a very memorable experience for me. I've seen myself grown both mentally and emotionally - and physically, of course.

Before I went to the army, I was thinking to myself - given the chance to avoid NS, I would definitely do so. Now reflecting back, I am glad that Singapore implemented national service. It's IMPERATIVE that all boys should go through NS.

One of the most memorable experience was the 24km road marches. Wearing your uniform, LBV, helmet, and carrying your rifle and bloody heavy field pack and marching throughout uneven ground for 24km. It's one of the most physically gruelling activities out there. And guess what, on the start of our march, it rained dogs and cats. Yet, we continued marching throughout the rain for eight hours. It was freaking cold. I felt so manly after I finished the bitter ordeal. And all of us got abrasion after the whole thing. Abrasion isn't fun. It bleeds and makes you walk as if you have 'tua lan pa'.

And of course, Passing Out Parade itself. It was a proud moment when our parents went out to place our jockey caps on our heads. And flinging it with abandon into the air. I'll really miss the times I had with my bunk mates. All the wise jokes we cracked, all the help they had offered. National Service by nature is horrible, but eating shit with my bunk mates makes a torturous camp into an enjoyable experience.

Signing off, I'll be going for a youth camp later in the evening.

Pretty girls please, oh Lord.

2007-11-24T22:57:00.000+08:00

I'll be going back into the steamy jungles for my SIT test from monday to wednesday.

I bloody hate outfield. Thank God it's going to be my last outfield for BMT. Passing out in two weeks time! (which is a rather sad thing.)

Oh Lord, if it's possible, let me be posted into Police as an Inspector. After that, I wouldn't mind signing on as a regular.

2007-11-10T12:50:00.000+08:00

I have a original dramatic pick-up line (which I have not used before) that goes like this...

Yes, we have met each other in our previous incarnation a long ago. I was a human warrior and you were an elf princess.

Since my secondary days, I had always liked elves. The cliche long flaxen hair, tall and slender bodies, sharp yet delicate facial features. And of course, who could forget those long, long ears.

A glorious picture to share - cosplay of an elf from Lineage.

2007-11-08T10:47:00.000+08:00

Field camp gotta be one of the worst days in my life.

On the first day itself, I caught a flu, followed by a fever later on. Because of that, I didn't have any appetite either. Throughout this entire six days in the jungle, I was feeling very weak. And field camp is mentally and physically taxing for any soldier, what more a sick and pampered guy like me.

The third night was probably the worst night in my entire miserable existence. It rained like fuck, and flooded several tents. We were practically sleeping on mud, with rainwater beating on our faces. We were all wet and muddy, and it was freaking cold throughout the night. My worst night indeed, and my bunkmate actually cried. What a pussy, lol.

The socks and underwear were wet, and when you think that the next shower you'll be having will be in like... three days time... you pretty much feel like taking the SOG to cut your wrist. Everyone else smelled like shit. And the combat rations deserved an entirely new blog post by itself. They make canteen food look like a heavenly banquet.

(The legendary pongteh chicken. It is as if someone vomited into the bag and throw a few preserved cubes of chicken into the obscene mixture. Thank God the commanders cut that from the menu.)

Field camp is tough, but when you look back, you recall the funny moments and complaints you made. It is a good memory and camping in the forests mould wimps to man - which we need more in this countries. I feel that Singaporean guys aren't manly enough, not like yours truly.

I am still sick by the way. Damn, I wanna go out!

2007-10-27T19:25:00.000+08:00

Something tragic happened this week. My buddy had OOT (out of training). I cried. Ever since the start of Army, we've been known to be the best pair. We clicked well.

And now, I am all alone to fend for myself in this harsh environment. Just this week, I got guard duty and confinement just for bloody petty reasons. I am quite pissed at the unfairness, but what can I actually do?

"I'll fight the good fight." - St. Paul

And I shall grow strong, and charge forward. Pain is temporary, Pride is forever. OCS!

On a lighter note, I look kinda feminine with eyeliner. How do I know? Army camo lessons. After you paint your face with camo cream (made from 100% vegetable oil. Oh wow, you could like, fry macdonald fries with it. Green fries, oishi!)

After wiping off the camo cream, you will automatically get an eyeliner mark.

It's damn funny when you see your buddy wipe off the camo cream, leaving only his lips black and ears green. Lol wtf, goth elf?

Or having ultra thick black eyebrowns and such.

2007-10-20T13:46:00.000+08:00

Each and every day of my life in Tekong is filled with laughter. So many memorable experiences, so many jokes I wish to share - about blur cocks, stupid errors, funny incidents, ghost stories, desperate guys, dramatized bullshit.

Oh yeah, I passed my standing broad jump and achieved 10 mins for 2.4km. 10 days more to the f**king field camp.

2007-09-27T23:46:00.000+08:00

NS is quite fun, really. For now, that is - it's currently still PTP phase. So all we are doing are mainly physical training and drills. Coming from a uniform group background (please don't be surprised), drills are like... cakewalk. Even my sec two cadets can march better than my platoon.

I am thankful to God for one good buddy and one good alternate buddy. We get along pretty well together, and I am quite well-liked by my other platoon mates. So all it's fine for now. Current dream: OCS... or clerk. Yes, a contrasting difference between dreams, I know. It's either the best or the slackest.

It's only two weeks and I have tons of stories to share. I just don't know where to start. Better not then. I'll tell you face to face some other time if you're interested to know.

Till next time, I get something so juicy I have to blog about it straight on the spot.

2007-09-12T16:36:00.000+08:00

The time is now. The place is Tekong.

Instead of being depressed, I am actually quite excited about going to the Green Hell. Though it will die out soon. LIKE VERY SOON. Like after tomorrow, I suspect.

To think about it, this two years is going to be very long. Time is relative, and in Tekong, time doesn't fly, it crawls as languidly slow as women using the washroom. I will feel as if I have grown a decade older.

That means I won't be writing anytime soon, omg gg damn sad plz. I was having plans to writing this fantasy story centering around a forbidden relationship between half-brother half-sister. Why? Because the forbidden fruit taste best.

Things I will miss: (not in any order)

1) The most important person in my life, the computer.

2) Lazing around

3) Air-condition, my comfortable bed

4) Sleeping late, waking late

5) Animes/Mangas

6) Good food

7) Games

8) My songs

9) Girls

10) Writing

Things I will not miss:

1) Church (or so I heard, amen?)

2) You.

I won't be blogging anytime soon, say for a month? So you don't have to bother checking for updates. Lest I disappoint you.

Unless I got some interesting things to share, which I probably WILL - considering I am such a dramatic storyteller. You can always meet up with me and treat me lunch/dinner or something.

2007-09-09T14:34:00.000+08:00

Question: What is the scientific term for the excessive, useless skin around the vagina?

Answer: Women

Okay, ignore that. My main topic today is on POW (Perfect Oriental Women)

Last night I dreamt I got together with a girl I once commented will make a good mother in the future. It was mortifying. Don't tell me I like her unconsiously omggg.

During Mass today, I was sitting beside a married woman I perceived as a POW. The husband is a lucky man, I thought. Then it made me realize my mother is a POW as well when she was in her prime. Don't tell me I am going to make the same mistake as my father in the near future? OH GEASS NO!

You know what the men say, 'You never know a woman until you marry her' My dad claims he still doesn't know my mum.

For the modern, rather feministic career women of today; they tend to look down on traditional POW, considering them as weak and spineless. Sorry to burst your bubbles, you mongrels, but POW are one of the greatest beings in existence.

Here's the rough definition of a traditional Perfect Oriental Women. Quoted from Riuva, a manly man just like Yours Truly.

Role
Oriental women, traditionally, always play a supportive role towards their men. She has to support her man, whatever she does, quietly and never step into the foreground. A ditz will not do, as she must have the abilities to help the man when he’s in trouble. Thus, attributes like intelligence and literary are essential to a perfect Oriental woman.

Character
As for personality, she should be shy, introverted, letting the man feel protective of her. Yet she cannot be over-reliant on him and must be able to take care of herself as well as her family. That is of course, another way to say she has to do the chores and take care of the kids. The perfect Oriental woman suffers without a word of complaint and is quietly resolute in the face of adversity. She is also expected to know exactly what he thinks or wants, without ever having to ask him. She is kind, compassionate towards all living beings and sympathetic towards others. She does not have personal goals, just the desire to serve her family.

Body
Mass media these days have made skeletons more popular though. Despite popular opinion now, Oriental women who had well-rounded hips and breasts are much coveted compared to their waif counterparts. They were believed to be better at producing offspring. As statistic has shown, it's kinda true!

Face
Good skin is always the most important. Good means to be as fair as possible, with zero blemishes, scars and pimples. Most orientals do not have double eyelids, so they tend to have small eyes. Large, expressive eyes are thus, always coveted. The mouth is also important as Asians believe that big lips are a sign of a gossip-monger.

Speech
She speaks softly and slowly but always calmly. Her voice soothes all who listen. There are no great fluctuations in tone, volume and pitch, which show that she is composed and mature. She is polite, doesn’t use unlady-like language and remains silent when she doesn’t have to speak. I once told Moses I wouldn't mind marrying a mute woman as long as she's cheerful. Save me from incessant nagging.

The modern male’s ideals have evolved (no thanks) to gender equality, but in general, guys will like a woman with the values listed above.

2007-09-07T16:10:00.000+08:00

Today I said goodbye to someone very dear to me.

We've known each other for four years, sharing both joy and sadness. In your little ways, you brought me closer to Jesus.

Seeing you leave was a heartache. And I am already missing you already.

2007-09-05T20:08:00.000+08:00

I am so depressed and demoralized now.

Firstly, I went to take my IPPT. I proceeded to jump 230 which is a three point, but it was a fault since my feet inched a bit before I jumped. The next one I missed the mark by one cm. WTF! And there was no retry. Instructors were bloody strict today.

Knn, go into NS for extra two more months because of one cm.

Secondly, I travelled all the way down to NUS because they had an anime bazaar and meido(!!!) cafe. My friend was very impressed with the fact that I could navigate to lecture 37. Okayyyy. I am a man, and we have good sense of direction unlike dumb women. It's the science section by the way.

I was sorely disappointed today. The anime bazaar was bleah. 'Meido cafe', my arse. All I saw was a maid running an ice cream booth. I was expecting four at the very least. One meido is fine, as long as she's kawaii. But noooooo...

A friend's friend thought I was hip. Because I wear eyeliner.

W... T... F!

Never once in my life have I tried eyeliner. I rather wear mascara anyday to eyeliner as they accentuate my small eyes. Oh, and for your information, I don't see any appeal in feminine guys.

I am so depressed and demoralized.

Quote of the week: 'Wait… ah – stop, not from behind'.

2007-08-28T02:36:00.000+08:00

I heard from a friend I appeared on TVmobile today. It was a programme on alternate sports. Right, if Magic can be considered a sport rofl. This is embarassing.

I recommend Code Geass to anyone who dabbles in animations. I watched the first five episodes and I went, 'Omg, this is going down as my top 3 favourite anime.'

It certainly did. The plot is rich and fluid. The characters were wonderful. Lelouch is my all-time favourite character - a very well-crafted dark protagionist. He's not gay like Kira Yamato, retard like Naruto, dense like Kurosaki Ichigo, wussy like Renton, emo like Shinji Ikari. Uhh, you more or less get the idea. Watch Code Geass. Pure win. If there is one character I'll cosplay, it'll certainly be Lelouch. Tall, slim, pale, raven hair?

Oh yeah, I started a bit on my Code Geass fanfiction. I'll probably finish it in two days time. Just take things easy, it's difficult to write. Romance is all about atmosphere and mood-setting.

C.C >> Karen = Shirley

You hear me, Moses!?! There is only one path. Lelouch/C.C pairing GOGOGO!

You can feel its awesomeness when I spend like, 275 words on the kissing scene alone. That's like 3/4 of a composition length. If I wrote something like this in my secondary school days, I would have become a legend in that english-retarded school. But I hear they stop story-writing for paper one liao. Sad.

Like I said I won't be posting here when I am done.

‘May I kiss you, C.C?’

C.C blinked in surprise, it was something that she thought Lelouch would never ask. He sounded a bit frail; his fingers clasping her shoulders trembled.

‘Yes.’

She felt Lelouch’s finger tightened around her shoulder. C.C closed her eyes and leaned forward. The gap between their lips shrank and dissipated to nothing. Lelouch pressed his lips against those of C.C. It was a light kiss – far from being called passionate. Her lips felt soft and cool; Lelouch felt a sensation of butterflies fluttering in his stomach. He held the kiss, pushing back C.C’s lime-green hair with his palms and cradled her head.

C.C gave a soft sigh of contentment, parting her lips slightly. Lelouch stole this opportunity to plunge his tongue past his lips, dipping into her mouth easily.

‘Mmph-’

It felt awkward for her as Lelouch’s hot tongue began to lash around within her mouth, probing every line and depth. As her tongue tries to pull away, Lelouch wrapped his around her. Unsure of what exactly she was supposed to do, C.C flicked her own tongue against the intruder. Soon enough, C.C found herself returning the kiss, their tongues curling and massaging each other, like a choreographed dance. She encircled his waist with her arms and melted into an embrace. It was completely different from the gentle kiss they shared before.

Lelouch didn’t know how long he stayed like that; his chest burning for oxygen.

Interesting how a tongue touching another tongue could generate such pleasures. Maybe it’s because the tongue is so close to the brain?

Lelouch disengaged from the kiss, panting for breath. ‘C.C …’

2007-08-22T19:40:00.000+08:00

The countdown begins! Twenty days to fun fun tekong chalet!

Everytime an e-mail from fanfiction.net pops up in my mail, I'll go, 'omg, let it be a review.' But nooooo, as usual, it's some other writer/reader that added my story to their favourite section.

You know something? Stories with explicit content attract a lot of attention. I have cold facts to prove it. I've posted four pieces of my work online, two being M18, the others PG-13. These are the figures.

I have a combined favs of twenty(!!) for my two M18 stories, and only a measly five for two PG-13 ones.

Personally, I think my PG-13 stories are written better. For the number of hits, 4343 hits for M18, 1311 hits for PG-13. WTF! This is plain preposterous, considering the M18 section is usually obscured.

As for now, I mentally prepare myself to write my greatest lemon work, a Code Geass fanfiction. Explicit lemons are not something written with extempore. Writers are treading on a thin line called OOC-ness. And considering I am after all, a HIV. (Holy Innocent Virgin)

I won't post it here once I am done writing as most of my blog readers are below twenty one. I am being very serious down here.

2007-08-15T14:29:00.000+08:00

People often complains how God can be so cruel, yet love us so much at the same time. Contradicting? I think not. Let's shift our perspective to third person view.

I am currently writing a fiction novel. Resolute is one of my main characters, and throughout the story, he faced despair numerous times - such as the pain of losing the woman he loved most. Does that mean I hate Resolute? Nope, in fact, I love him. After all, Resolute is modelled after me. He's slim, tall, with long raven hair. He's laidback, composed and enjoys eating bacon.

The same way God is writing a novel, a story named 'the life of Clement'. It's an incredibly boring and simple book, I must say. I would really prefer it if the story had a harem plot with Clement being the lead, of course.

And the main lead just lost his raison detre, his reason for existence. My dream one day is to live in a large mansion maintained by girls wearing french maid outfits.

Then on this fateful day, Elaine told me that meidos don't wear maid uniforms in France.

THEN WHY IS IT CALLED FRENCH MAID OUTFIT? HOW CAN THAT BE? I DON'T CARE ANYMORE. I WON'T ACCEPT ANY OF THIS.

meidos... neko-mimi meidos...

MY WHOLE LIFE HAS BEEN A LIE.

2007-08-10T00:28:00.000+08:00

I am no expert in making home-made pizza, and neither do I read cooking books. It is trial and error, and I'll continue to improve from then. Here's a few simple steps to make a good pizza.

Ummm, for dough you can buy it from supermarkets or make your own. Surprisingly, it's rather easy to make your base. If you do use your own base, sprinkle some flour on the pan to prevent the base from getting stuck to it.

Then spread either spaghetti sauce or tomato puree over the base.

Suggested ingredients: diced capisicum, chopped sausage, sliced ham, canned pineapples.

That is, if you're making 3 pizza or more. If not, sliced ham is more than enough.

As for cheese, use a mix of cheddar cheese and morazella cheese. Ratio 1 : 2

Cheddar cheese is rather salty, so you don't want too much of it. It's to give pizza the crisp golden brown cheese aesthetics. And it's best for cheddar to be grated finely.

Morazella cheese, as you know, is the the distinctively stretchy cheese that give pizza its 'kick'. It has a light delightful flavour, so more of it is fine.

Next, bake for uhh... twenty five minutes. Unlike Moses who would bake the base for 15 minutes, followed by the cheese for a measly five-ten minutes. I prefer to bake the pizza as a whole and longer. So that the cheddar is in all its crisp, golden brown goodness and the morazella spread out and melted like say... pimple pus?

Alright, Ja!

2007-08-07T12:11:00.000+08:00

I've not cut my hair for two months and not planning to do so. Why bother when I am going bald in one month time?

I am planning to donate my hair to the children cancer society. It'll be a waste of my thick, long, luscious locks if it is left on the floor of the NS barber room when I can actually give it to someone who would be grateful for my hair. The problem is I don't know where to start.

Either that or I will go down to some cheapskate neighbourhood barber and ask if I could shave my own hair. You know... have some fun with it?

Like shaving only top half of my head like wang feihong?

Or ronaldino's hairstyle. Shaving everything except the top half of your head.

2007-07-31T19:42:00.000+08:00

I don't claim myself to be a Harry Potter fan since most of its fans are shallow-minded readers. Yet I can't help but be enveloped by a bittersweet feeling when the series concluded.

Harry Potter is a boring and crappy character in my opinion, but throughout the series I've watched him grow, like how I grew up reading the book one when I was in secondary two and finally finished the series when I am f**king twenty. Wonderful marketing technique I must say, JK rowling. The older fans stayed while attracting fresh, new blood. Did I ever mentioned that woman is more insured than the queen of England herself?

At least Harry grew unlike Luffy from one piece who remained the same as he was from episode 1 to episode 300 to episode god-know-what.

But you know in book seven, Harry shared the same tent as Hermione for weeks, and you expect me to believe that two hormonal, attractive teenagers didn't do anything?

2007-07-29T20:38:00.000+08:00

O, I feel so miserable.

More than half of my friends went to NS. Leaving me all behind. No one to join me for training.

Two of my playmates qualified for Nationals. I also wanna play. =(

Boohoo.

2007-07-23T19:37:00.000+08:00

As compensation for not blogging for a week, I shall blog something juicy this time, alright?

A kid riding his kick-scooter ran over my toe and I am bleeding now.

I swam twenty laps today.

Okay, that was pretty random. Now to the focal point! Why good guys are losers.

A sterling scenerio:

Jimmy has a crush on a girl... uhh Yua Aida. Naturally, Jimmy wants those feelings reciprocated, so he does lots of nice things for her. Such as: listening to all her complaints and problems, changes himself to become the guy Yua Aida would have liked. And they became close friends.

Either

a) Jimmy confesses but Yua Aida gets upset and avoids him for eternity.

or

b) Yua Aida starts sharing deeper, personal stuff, say, about some other guy she likes who doesn't like her back. Jimmy, of course, listens patiently, with his heart shredded to pieces. So, in the end, Jimmy becomes an emotional punching bag.

Of course, we all sympathize with Jimmy and hope that one day he will get Yua Aida.

Then again, the input does not equates the output.

(Sidenote: Yua Aida is the name of a popular *ahem* star. And well, Jimmy is just some loser.)

Once, on the train to bishan, I witnessed a lover's quarrel. A rather cute girl from a prestigious JC (in uniform) was chiding her 'badboy' boyfriend (look at how they dress). Apparently, the girl bought an expensive book for her boyfriend and he didn't read it. Why of course, bad boys are generally stupid.

I shook my head disdainfully. If that girl had the merits to enter a good JC, why would she go out with such a retarded 'badboy' when you can go out with... the intellectual Clement-sama! His Excellency could engage you with myriad of topics more interesting than the weather or 'what you had for lunch?' If any girl buys me a book, I'll read it for sure unless it's the bible or something.

But you know why the bad boy succeeded while His Excellency would have probably failed? Because he belongs to the 'badboy' catergory, while Clement-sama belongs to the 'refined gentlemen catergory'. Okay, maybe not.

It's because that guy knows how to pleasure a girl/woman.

Oh yes, it's that particular body part! The way to a girl's pleasure is through her... clitor - I MEANT EAR!

And for those who read too much romance, I don't mean 'hot breath against her ear or nimbling gently on her earlobes' kind of thing.

I meant honeyed words. Being a compulsive liar does pay after all!

Of course, Clement-sama fails miserably. Take a look at another sterling scenerio.

Girl: This dessert is a bit too sweet.
Clement: I suspect it wouldn't be as sweet as the taste of your lips.

Here are the few replies I come across.

a) *burst out laughing*

or

b) You and your flirtatious comments

or

c) As if, you say that to every girl right?

Never once have I ever got the reaction of 'blushed furiously and look away'. Why is it that you girls don't believe me! NOOOO! I don't say such dramatic stuff to every other girls. Only to the pretty ones! Just like yoooooou!

I fail in life, seriously.

2007-07-15T21:38:00.000+08:00

Went to Moses's house yesterday to make pizza. You know, I always wondered why people dont add bacon into pizzas. Now I understand.

If some improvements were to be made, it would be:

1) Add mushrooms

2) Ham steak instead of bacon

3) Some BBQ sauce

4) Two different type of cheese instead of one

5) Oil. No, really.

Oh, the bloody expenses! But we could be able to cut on that since my mum know how to make the dough or base whatever. And as shown, making your pizza, you can stuff all the meat you want lolol.

Ze process! (before adding copious amount of morazella cheese)

2007-07-11T14:40:00.000+08:00

Why is it that paintings and sculptures always show St Michael triumph over Lucifer? Logically-speaking, Lucifer would pwnz0r St Michael. Since...

No.1) Lucifer was the greatest and mightiest angel in Heaven.

No.2) Whenever a figure goes to the dark side. They level up and become more powerful. This theory is proven in all games, movies, animes and mangas. When have you ever seen a character gone to the dark side and emerge weaker?

If I have enough inspiration, I might churn out a short novella with Lucifer being the protagionist. As for now, here's a composition that will get a perfect score if you're from a catholic school lolol.

In the beginning, there was the word. And the word was God…

A lone archangel guarded the gates of Etemenanki. It was Michael, two of his six perfect wings obscuring his face. His plumage was full, pristine white with a mother-of-pearl sheen.

“You’ll pay for this impertinence.” Archangel Michael spoke directly into his mind. A mellifluous, baritone voice filled with resentment.

Behind the approaching seraphim were corpses of countless angels laid like flagstones of war. Their wings snapped at impossible angles, their expressions horrific with glazed eyes and lips opened in silent screams. The seraphim flicked his great black blade, splattering on holy ground the blood of slain angels.

Michael retracted his wings, revealing his beautiful face. And his fiery eyes thundered open.

“Feel the wrath of God.”

Ripples of crimson fire swept across the area, the burning faith of Archangel Michael incinerating all in its wake. The corpses of slain angels crumbled and curled to ashes, and from ashes to flame.

The seraphim smirked in reply, and proceeded to spread all six of his wings. What was once known as the most beautiful wings in Heaven were now tainted black. The oppressive darkness emanated from his ebony feathers extinguished the holy flames.

A great sword materialized in Archangel Michael’s hand, its golden blade flared under his grip.

“To brush off the righteous fire of faith, Lucifer… just how far have you exactly fallen?”

The clash of great swords thundered so tremendously, that Heaven shook as the bringer of light battled against the general of God’s army.

The two angels weaved in and out, moving like a choreographed dance. Darkness and fire collided in an epic battle of domination. Lucifer beat his wings strongly, shooting black feathers that transformed to serrated arrows in mid-flight. Michael stepped back and swung his great sword, a fan of flames trailing behind the golden blade. The arrows cluttered uselessly against the shield of fire. Michael then plunge his sword forward, in which Lucifer riposted, scoring a wound on the archangel’s right arm and knocking the golden blade off. Michael tumbled down and tried to rise, only to find the wicked black blade of Lucifer staring at his unprotected white neck.

“Lucifer, you…”

“You were never my equal, Brother Michael.”

Lucifer lowered his great black blade and headed towards gates of Etemenanki, where the throne of God resides.

Sighing disdainfully, Archangel Michael picked up his sword. He remembered Lucifer as the greatest and the most beautiful angel, the first to rebel against God. But most importantly, he’ll always remember Lucifer as the first angel to shed tears.

2007-07-05T11:49:00.000+08:00

It ticks me off.

I bet you've seen it before, or maybe you're even guilty of it. People (mostly girls) spamming 'lovey-dovey' messages on their MSN, their blogs, their whatever. And when they get into a quarrel, their message will be something miserable and suicidal-sounding.

To name a few unholy examples:

mArCuS luV eUnIcE

or something like,

i HaVe fOunD mY tRuE hApPiNeSs

...

Let me enlighten you. The thing is...

No one cares.

***************

On a lighter note, here's two or three pictures taken at graduation. Can't show all of course. *ahem*

2007-06-30T19:49:00.000+08:00

In case you're wondering, I did manage to get a IT showgirl's handphone number.

But then, it's more out of fun. I didn't bother to call her afterwards, geez. But she's pretty but not my type, oh well.

***************

Transformers is damn good. It's very action-packed, with awesome CGI and... sexual-innuendo jokes. It's one of the best movies I seen this year, possibly better than Pirates of the carribean 3. Worth of the hype, not to mention it's a Steven Spielberg film.

Optimus Prime isn't as gay in the movies. Phew!

Here's what happened in the ending of the Transformers animation movie...

All alone, Optimus Prime jumped into enemy territories and destroyed every other robots within ten kilometres range. He then proceeded to battle out with Megatron and emerge victorious.

...

w...t...f

That's as gay as Kira 'Jesus' Yamato in Gundam Seed Destiny.

Well, he did have an epic battle with Megatron, which is ... not very epic.

2007-06-21T21:49:00.000+08:00

Segways.

They are mobile two-wheel chariots. Cool stuff. I rode on them at the IT show today, and captured the attention of men, women and ladies alike. Suddenly, it's like His Excellency turned into the most good-looking guy ever. (not that anyone objects to that, of course)

Okay never mind that, tomorrow I aim to get a showgirl model's handphone number.

***************

Brought Amanda out for dinner today. She didn't know what to get for my birthday, so I told her a cap would be fine.

The cap she bought was, uhh... too gaudy for my taste. Think glittery, glittery stuff. But oh well, it's the thought that counts. I thought it was quite obvious that my dressing style is rather dull. Most of my clothes are either being white, black or grey - which some of my friends think it's quite a waste I don't dress well. I am too casual. *shrug*

Even if I am a girl, I think I'll dress in white, black, grey and the WINNING COMBINATION! I told Amanda about it. And she swore she'll never wear like that. Amanda claimed Alyssa would look better in it. Alyssa and the winning combination. Hmm...

(I totally agree lawl)

Well, the winning combination is quite common among taiwanese and japanese girls. Singaporeans that embrace it usually fail badly, and look like ah lians instead. Pull it off, and it will look elegant.

Knee-high long black socks goes very well with long, swishy skirts like how burgers go with fries. No really, I am being dead serious here. Elaine seem to like those type of skirts, so I bought one of those socks for her when I was in Taiwan. I am sure all's well since she's the most elegant... monkey I know.

One of my colleagues, a NTU student wore it to work once, and the guys were complimenting how anime-ish she look. Oh wait, I haven't even spoken about what's exactly the winning combination.

It's knee-long black socks with a short black skirt. Pure win.

2007-06-19T20:09:00.000+08:00

Communication Asia

I was very excited when my colleagues said there will be blonde, long-legged russian ladies at our booth. But NOOOO...

In the end, there were only four Singaporean/Malaysian girls. And they did their job of attracting all the dirty old men who would ogle at their chest and lick their lips.

Uhh, please be a little discreet next time.

One of the girls is an eye-candy, I had fun talking with her. She's prettier than uhhh... *coughadelcough*

The girls from the other booth are also beautiful, either that or slutty-looking rofl. Thank God I am working together with a horny guy colleague, can stare at girls together.

I'll see if I can get any pictures of this 4 day, but don't get ur hopes high. I should be able to post my graduation pictures soon.

Next blogpost shall be on the National Writing Competition.

2007-06-15T00:02:00.000+08:00

Clement: What time does your work end?

Girl: 10pm

Clement: Alright, I'll pick you up at your workplace at 10pm then.

And then I revised what I just said. Something incongruous. Something Clement-sama wouldn't say.

I sounded something like a tender-loving boyfriend.

Okay never mind.

***************

Happy birthday to me. =(
Happy birthday to me. =(
Happy birthday to Clement-sama. =(
Happy birthday to me. =(

I am feeling damn old please. Now I understand why women prefer their age as a secret.

2007-06-11T23:42:00.000+08:00

My birthday is this friday, June 15th. Keep that in mind.

I haven't been given much assigments at work, so guess what I did to keep myself occupied.

I wrote stories. lawl.

Currently, I am in need of dire help for the National Art Council writing competition. I need a plot device for an original short story. Someone, pretty please?

http://www.fictionpress.com/~wintertwilight

Here's the site I post my stuff. Will be posting the next chapter this week. If you happen to know how to submit reviews, give me one.

This is my favourite part. Cryptic-sounding stuff = win

The spinning tapestry of colored glass shattered and its iridescent shards rained down, exhibiting spectral colors formed by refraction of light. Reality warped, time flooding back as though it was pulled into a vacuum. Fate is not absolute; it forks into myriad of possibilities.

2007-06-07T00:07:00.000+08:00

Working life is miserable. I'll take studies anyday to work. Dreading the years to come. Oh, the horrors!

Met up with my secondary school friends today, and Youde taught me something important. Nuggets of wisdom, so listen up.

...If you have completed your work, keep silent and just act busy.

Wow, so simple yet so powerful.

My my, I am going to write drabbles in work next time.

And speaking about writing, I was pleasantly surprised when Xinkai quoted a phrase from my works. I'll post it up soon, but then again I hate to do so due to blogger. It doesn't seem to recognize some punctuations from the Microsoft word format.

2007-06-03T22:27:00.000+08:00

And so, the IT fair is over.

I skipped today's work because I am starting a three months attachment at D-synergy. Oh, the much-needed break from all that standing.

Monday - Friday 9pm - 6pm
Saturday 9pm - 1pm

I am starting to miss my holidays. I still have so much things to do.

Regrettably, I only have one life to waste on games and manga.

2007-05-31T23:29:00.000+08:00

Today's my first day at IT fair - observing you kiasu Singaporeans first-hand.

Argh, my feets are kinda pwn3d. It must have been much worse for girls who wears high-heel. (was using that as a topic starter to break the ice with some girl from another booth lolol)

For those who stand more than 8 hours a day. Beware of vericose veins!

Oh yeah, some IT promoters damn fierce. The girls distributing flyers wear mini-skirt or even bikinis. OMG WIN.

Not that we mind, of course.

2007-05-26T21:00:00.000+08:00

It's been more than two years since I went for a swim. Three hours under the scorching sun is bound to leave me me shedding dead human skin next week. Jurong west complex is quite new, so didn't expect any babes there. And my prophetic gifts were righttt.

Swimming is fun, but I really hate the aftermath. Swimming makes the hair dry, and I had this axiom in mind that swimming is bad for the complexion, considering all the pollutants in the chlorine water. But then, look at Alyssa. Not a single pimple marr her flawless, perfect complexion!

Is swimming really bad for the skin? Hmmm.

Other than the freckles part, omg. Hope I don't catch those nasties.

Oh, and I taught Xin kai how to swim today. In a mere hour, he transformed from a hydrophobic guy to a person who does breaststroke ... moving a grand total of one metre! No really, it's quite an achievement. When I was primary two, I had to use floats.

Come to think about it, I would prefer to teach a girl. Blah.

2007-05-22T16:27:00.000+08:00

I am down with fever, that's why I am blogging now to gain some sympathy points.

Boohoo, no one to take care of me (sit beside my bed and cry like some sappy love story)

...And worst of all, my mother actually gave me the wrong medicine. Right.

My head's really heavy now, so blogging is the supposely light activity I can tahan as compared to gaming or reading.

***************

Two days ago at church, the second communion hymn was...

'Horny Girls Win'

I was like, "Huh, what the ...?"

And the choir started singing, "On Eagles Wing."

And I was thinking to myself, how did 'On Eagles Wing' transformed to 'Horny Girls Win'

Let's break down the titles to phonics and syllabus.

On - ee - girls - wing (On Eagles Wing)

Hor - ni - girls - win (Horny Girls win)

***************

For my family, we go to church individually. Here's what my mother did two weeks ago at the 1045am mass in St.Mary.

The priest was goofing around for whatever reasons. He was asking the parishioners to turn towards their neighbour 'say hello and ask a question'.

Sitting right beside my mother was a eighteen year old girl.

She asked my mother, 'How are you?'

My mother asked her, 'Would you be my son's girlfriend?'

Best...mum...ever. And she thinks it's damn funny.

*shrug*

2007-05-19T00:02:00.000+08:00

About the pilot selection test...

A test with a 2% percent pass rate. Obviously, I failed.

However they are pleased to inform me I am qualified to become a Weapon System Officer due to my 1337 navigation skills.

Then again, I remembered I suck in reading maps.

And chicks dig pilots, not Weapon System Officers.

Unless they are posting me to Tekong, that's no chance in hell I am going to join the Air Force.

***************

I am suffering from some kind of mild depression, I think.

I've been thinking a lot. A person like me was never meant for big things. Worse still, I have no motivation to improve myself.

2007-05-13T19:00:00.000+08:00

A short post. Tips on how to avoid misfortunate encounters in the night.

1) Travel in even numbers. Strange things tend to happen in odds.

2) When someone calls your name in the night, do not turn your head. I did that once and regretted it. Instead, the chinese says, 'Turn 360 degrees.'

3) For those going NS, try not to shine your torchlight into the trees.

...you might scare monkeys.

4) If you're with a group, and you witness some strange things. Ask your friends if they see anything. If they do not, ignore it and carry on with whatever you're doing. If they do, then GG.

5) Just ignore them. Simple as that. Don't acknowledge their presence by screaming or speaking to them. Look as if nothing happened.

6) Usually, a ghost's facial features is either blurred, or distorted, or even faceless. Anyone can explain why? Then again, it's possible to see things with only white legs and no upper body. Omoshirou.

7) Use even strange events to your advantage. Good strategists seize any opportunities. Say, taking advantage of a frightened girl by comforting her? Or chao keng in a training camp.

***************

Fun things to do at a funeral:

1) Catch a black cat and throw it on top of the coffin.

2) Some traditions involve putting a coin on the lips of the corpse. Exchange it with an arcade token. Super funland 4TW LOLOL!!!

2007-05-07T20:55:00.000+08:00

I don't why some people say Spiderman 3 was bad. The newspaper also gave it 2.5 star rating upon 5. I thought the chereographed fights were pretty good. And omg, Pirates of the Carribean 3.

"Welcome to Singapore."

...shameless self-promotion.

I bet Singapore paid them to say something like that. But then again, the publicity is needed. We may know about foreign countries, but they do not know about us. Some people seem to think Singapore is some kind of port.

***

A lot of girls like calling me a mean person.

Well ladies, I have developed the counterbalancing punchline.

Girl: Clement, you're damn mean.
Clement: Handsome men are the worst.

It does sound like what Clement would, doesn't it? omg I am so witty lolol.

Very soon, you girls would be saying how nice, how sweet, how lovable I am.

And now, I need one for a minor group of girls who think I am some kind of pervert. Strange, misguided bunch.

2007-05-05T22:31:00.000+08:00

They are selling lion's meat at Shop and Save. And at a very affordable price!

What are you waiting for? GOGOGO!

2007-05-02T16:09:00.000+08:00

My new neighbours moved in. It's an indian family.

Why?

Why have you abandon me, oh Lord?

What I am really looking for is a ... girl-next-door scenerio? Some sweet young thing would move in, and somehow, we'll become a loving, cute couple. It seem to happen a lot in movies and dramas.

Poor...loveless...me.

2007-04-27T12:27:00.000+08:00

I am back. And I shall blog about my trip in the next post, bound to have sexual contents not suited for minors.

His Excellency received his NS letter.

When all my other friends are going in June/July, I am enlisting in septemember.

Screw you, Mindef.

Now, it's going to slightly more boring with my guy friends away. And, they are going ORD 2 months earlier. Do you see the picture?

And the long, long break is going to atrophy me.

Oh well, I just got a job at Jurong Port to shave off 1-2 months. Hopefully, it's slack.

***************

I also received a letter from The Air Force, claiming I am identified as a potential RSAF military officer, being a pilot based on my medical status and intelligence.

O RLY?

YA RLY!

...just that I am supposed to take a five hours Pilot Selection Test, which is a glorious, barren waste of good time.

Once again, I thought I was chosen due to my manliness. Until I heard that girly Alfred received the letter too. So that point is stamped as moot. Oh well.

2007-04-22T20:32:00.000+08:00

I won't be around from this monday till thursday.

I am going Thailand for a holiday.

And since I'll be having quite a number of spare days around, I am planning for another cruise trip, or maybe, even going to Japan!

...perhaps.

See you guys around soon. Ja ne!

2007-04-20T23:35:00.000+08:00

I received some protests from some girl friends that I view them as plump when they are supposely in the acceptable weight.

Now now, you girls have to put yourself in my shoes. I am seeing things from another dimension. I never had the sensation of my stomach jiggling when I run, and I have the luxury of seeing my foot when I look down.

My waist is 27 inches(rounded up, mind you) which is good for a girl my height. Needless to say, it's incredibly small for a real man like me.

It's rude to call me skinny. Call me slim if you please.

A friend of mine who is around the same height as me is placed in PES B because he's underweight. EXCUSE ME! I am like, eight kilogrammes lighter than him and those imbeciles have the audacity to place His Excellency in PES A?

Reason why?

I exude so much manliness, he must have been awed. Stare into my dark marble eyes and you will understand why.

Sometimes it's so much, I have problems suppressing the sheer amount of manliness residing within.

But anyway, I need to downgrade to a PES C during NS. Probably use my weak heart as an excuse. Either that, or I'll think of something else on the way.

***************

Some of the best dishes in life come cheap and one of them is...

Campbell corn with chicken/mushroom soup. It's one of the best soups out there. Trust me on that one.

2007-04-13T00:28:00.000+08:00

Oh yes, I know I have neglected blogging. Guess I forgot about blogging since I got more urgent things like say... chionging series?

Life is still fine to me. Whenever someone ask what I am doing, I will answer I am self-employed and currently waiting for NS.

90% of them will then fix their gaze on my long hair and comment about it. I am not that sad to lose my locks, don't worry!

Well, of course I'll miss it. I have been wearing my hair long for four years already. When I was younger, I wouldn't have imagine that I would ever kept it so long.

***************

I adore girls with delicate, sprite-like features. But they are quite a rare find in Singapore, considering most of the females are more to the handsome side.

I prefer slimmer girls. Above 45kg and you're considered plump in my eyes.

Height doesn't really matter, I don't mind short girls since I am quite short myself too - shorter people might beg to differ though. Damn my short genes, my dad being 163cm, my mum and sis standing at 160cm.

Watching too much of the harem genre can result in the loss of sanity. Madness? This is Sparta!!!

I...want...to...eat...Elaine's...home-made...bento...

2007-04-06T12:46:00.000+08:00

How many of us kept watch and prayed yesterday?

*whistle and look away*

The sky is going to darken at 3pm. It always have been on every Good Friday. Purely coincidence? It's just a small miracle God reveals every now and then.

Good Friday is also a good day to rewatch 'Passion of the Christ'. Personally, I have rewatched it four times. A show that made the manliest of men cry.

(Nothing compared to a friend who rewatched more twenty times. He's practically immune.)

2007-04-04T23:34:00.000+08:00

OH NOES! It's back! Those damn monthly cravings!

Two months ago, it was for pudding! Custard puddings, fruit puddings, chocalate puddings.

This month, it is pies! I just want to sink my teeth into a big juicy meat pie.

Be it the one I had at a cafe four years ago. The one with grilled german sausages and plump mushrooms.

Maybe, a decent chicken pie pastry.

Or a beef one. I haven't tried one of those before.

I have vanilla ice cream in the fridge. Maybe I should buy back an apple pie tomorrow.

Look, Gelare! NOOO, why is it not tuesday today.

Anyway, I was supposed to blog something deep and profound. But I forgotten what was it.

2007-04-03T12:40:00.000+08:00

It was a refreshingly good five week break. I have spent most of the time doing the things I like: games, animes, novels, and going out with friends. I am contented and enjoyed this precious break.

I have no qualms against Moses' belief, and I even conform to it. But sometimes, too much is not good. It's time to break out of our comfort zone and do things more meaningful. If I do nothing but slack my days away, I don't feel very good about it. As the years pass, I won't remember the books I read, the games and animes I chiong. But whatever makes us happy lar.

A proverb, 'Slack is good, but hardwork is better.'

WHILE I am lazing my ass around, one of my closest friends, Lloyd was building up his network and managed to establish two companies. I laughed when I saw his namecard. The introvert I knew went out on his own to mingle with strangers.

Lloyd: Now, I owned two companies. What have you been doing?

Clement: Uhhhhh, I am self-employed. Currently, I am doing freelance. *thinking about his survey job*

After meeting at PS, he brought me and my friend to a talk by a Taiwan professor. Supposely, the room were filled with sucessful people, example: self-made multi-millionaires?

Lloyd: See that guy arranging the chairs? He's a millionaire.

Clement: Okayyy...

After the talk, I had the chance to meet and mingle with directors from various companies. I managed to socialize well, I think; even though they were the one that approached me. They have tons of stories and experience to share. Especially on how n00bs in studies become their own bosses and get all the degree holders to work under them. Yes, that made me feel better.

Whatever it is, all I want is a rich tai tai (preferably, dying) to support me. I'll carry all their shopping bags!

2007-04-01T21:18:00.000+08:00

So, this is how it feels when you finally achieve your dreams.

Despite the heavy sacrifice I paid, somehow, it feels so surreal.

Ahh, at long last! Dining at a meido cafe.

2007-03-29T23:25:00.000+08:00

For n00bs who eat a lot of instant noodles. Here's a new thing I learnt on how to eat it safetly without harming our bodies.

Normally, how we cook the instant noodles is to put the noodles into a pot with water, throw in the powder and let it cook for around 3 mins before eating. This is the WRONG method of cooking the instant noodles.

By boiling the powder, normally with MSG, it will change the molecular structures of the MSG - causing it to be toxic. Instant noodles are coated with wax and it will take around 4 to 5 days for the body to excrete it.

So the CORRECT method is to ...

1. boil the noodles in a pot with water.

2. once the noodles is cooked, take out the noodles, and throw away the water containing the wax.

3. boil another pot of water till boiling point and put the noodles into the hot boiling water and then shut off the fire.

4. only at this stage when the fire is off, and while the water is very hot, pour the seasoning with the powder into the water.

Clement's note: Bad grammar, bad sentence structure, bad everything - the english was absolutely atrocious. The above passage was heavily editted, and I can still bet I missed a few.

2007-03-28T12:25:00.000+08:00

Have you ever felt frustrated with yourself?

I do. And have been struggling with it since four years ago.

I've seen girls my age going University while I am starting my third year in polytechnic. Now, I see my poly friends happily chattering on which university to enrol.

I have no one to blame but my own paucity.

Am I to remain mediocre, a person that no one speaks about? What's this desire to prove your self-worth?

2007-03-23T13:08:00.000+08:00

People this days have achievable, pathetic goals. Get a good-paying job, and that's about it. Che, such a small dream. To quote Team Rocket, 'If you want to dream, dream big.'

So, you ask what's so big about mine that I could belittle yours? Brace yourself, low-life.

By the age of 27, I would live in a mansion, together with a harem of meidos. I figured that two wasn't enough. An insurmountable dream, indeed.

Why am I drawn towards meidos just like a moth to a flame? I am lazy. Imagine having a servant who is willing to do everything for you. To name a few: wash your clothes, prepare your meals, clean your house. And who can resist kawaii girls in french maid outfits? Ohohohohoho! Meidos also represent what all woman should be, submissive.

Actually, I was just kidding about the earlier paragraph. In my previous incarnation, I was a french nobleman. That thesis also explains my salient elegance, grace, and class.

2007-03-18T14:57:00.000+08:00

Another phase of my life has officially ended. And I am not looking forward to next one. You can simply regard National Service as a two year hiatus.

I am going to give a shot at the article writing contest at Londes. If they find me satisfactory, I might be given a place as a columnist. And perhaps in the near future, you could see me as a journalist!!!

(Haha, if that will EVER happen.)

I do prefer writing as a form of expressing myself, since it allows me to melodramatize and flaunt my erudite linguistic capabilities. Some people think of this as a talent, but they were sorely mislead. It's through hard work alone that substantiate my command of le queen's english.

Most people haven't realize that my foundation in language isn't exactly strong. If you ask me, "Give nine uses of capitalization." I probably could only churn out five. Frankly speaking, I am just masquerading as a 'man of great copiousity'.

Anyway, I hope to get my article published on the website. Even if it's not, some constructive critism would be welcomed.

Memorable quotes:

"You mean there are girls in St Francis?"

"I am top 11 eternal player in my country!"
"Yes, and that's out of 30 players."

2007-03-14T22:21:00.000+08:00

300.

You are obliged to say it rocks.

For the ignomarus, 300 is based on the battle of Thermopylae that took place in around 480BC. Spartan king Leonidas led 300 soldiers against a million Persians, and their heroic display provided ample time for Greece to unite and overcome the invaders.

Of course, 300 the movie is fictional, where the spartans have to face raving slaves, immortals, mutated beings, exotic beasts, and a homosexual god-king.

If you haven't watch it, quit being such a 'lady' and catch it.

King Leonidas encompassed all the characteristics of a real man. Truly, an epitome.

(Although waxing your legs is rather... questionable.)

Interesting note: King Leonidas is played by Gerard Butler, who also played The Phantom, Erik in Phantom of the Opera.

2007-03-13T18:22:00.000+08:00

Note: This post contains no pictures. That will wait for another day. Due to explicit reasons, it's enough incentive to read on.

The Taiwan holiday wasn't DA BOMB or anything close to that. It was just fine.

Since time immemorial, Singaporeans were brainwashed by repeated propangandas of KFC being THE fast food restaurant for fried chicken. Today is the day of salvation for my fellow readers; His Excellency will break the chains of bondage holding you back.
Located at Changi airport, terminal 2, there is fast food restaurant called Popeye's. They serve piping hot cajun-styled fried chicken that pwnz0rz KFC's. Their whipped potato taste strange though, it's almost like mashed potato with spicy Japanese curry - not that I have any qualms. Price-wise, it's slightly cheaper than KFC. You have not tried fried chicken if you have Popeye's chicken and biscuit. Uhh, need a better analogy? You have not met real men if you have not met *ahem* you-know-who.

(Your excellency, can you stop sounding so dramatic?)

I'll start with the cons.

With 99.99999% of its population being slant-eyed yellow-skinned monkeys (see: Chinese), everyone speaks Mandarin. It's not racism when I am a Chinese too. People have a hard time understanding what His Excellency is trying to say. They ask if I speak 'guo yu' whenever English escape my lips.

Now, back to reasons why Taiwan is better than Singapore.

Taiwan has wayyy prettier girls. That itself is THE reason. Most of their dressing style were influenced by the Japanese fashion industry. In Singapore, we just label that as.. 'ah lian that type lor'. Because our girls can't pull it off. Their hairstyles are definitely more trendy as compared to Singaporean girls leaning towards...rebonding teh omgwtflol?

As I mentioned before, Singaporean girls are awful, and all would agree save a few abnormal ones. Being Singaporean, I weep at all possibilities denied. The guys are also more good-looking (in a efeminine manner), half of them have longer hair than me. But you know what? Screw that preposterous SNAG bullshit. We Singaporean men are more rugged, more manly, more muscular; and proud about it too. At least, most of us are. If you aren't, stop being such a 'lady' and start being a man. Support manliness with me!

If there was any memorable eye-candy, it would be this girl I saw helping out her mother at the food stall. I didn't snap a picture of her sadly. But the best I could is describe? Let's see. Hmmm... a well-balanced and much taller Adelaide with aquiline facial features, sporting long hair with elegant curls. ZOMG, kawaii desho desho? Don't get what I am saying? How about ... Tifa from FF7 with curls in her hair? If I am Taiwanese, I would have hit on her. Once again, possibilities denied.

Another reason why Taiwan >>> Singapore. They have this channel called 'HOT', which shows nothing but glorious Japanese Adult Videos. Half the time in the inn, I am either watching anime or that ...... with my father. Singapore should certainly get that channel.

Taiwan appear to have a lot of otakus - lot of Fate/Stay Night fans. By some serendipitous force, I chanced upon this particular shop. My sister was wondering why the shop was so packed with males. Then it hitted us, it's a M18 shop! It was my first time, and wow, it brought meaning to the saying, 'heaven can be found on earth'. H-games, H-doujins, gravure magazines, pornographic etc. ZOMG!!!! Very much to my disappointment, they were out of stock on Tsukihime, and so, I bought Fate/Stay Night, in hope that one day MirrorMoon would complete the english translation.

Oh yes, I did consider buying some pornography for my guy friends, but was spoilt for choice. They even had a computer system to search out what genre/fetishes you favour. My sister thought meidos were cute (it runs through the blood, meidos ftw.) I didn't stay too long in there either, in case it corrupts too much of my sweet innocence.

2007-03-07T19:12:00.000+08:00

I have yet to pilfer the chalet photographs from Esther's image copious blog. So the pictures will have to wait for now.

I won't be around for a week. In twelve hours time, I'll be flying off to Taipei for a holiday! Street snacks, desserts, shopping, cherry blossoms, site seeing such as: Taiwanese girls FTW!

(My dad claims that Taiwanese girls aren't as pretty as I think. But oh well, we'll get to know that soon.)

And please don't ask for sourveniers. I am poor. Best I could do is share with you my experience.

What I need now is a good novel to read on the way. :(

***************

There was an article/report/blog on Grand Prix: Singapore, and here's one poignant, even ludicrous comment from the reporter.

"Oh, and lest I forget, aside from an absence of Japanese girls, I think they have secretly been recruiting the cutest girls from the rest of Asia to come here and stay."

There is seriously something wrong with him. Isn't Singapore is well-known for having abyssmal-looking girls? No, really.

From the article, it dawned upon me that my opponent in round 3 at the legacy side event was a famous ProTour player, Helmut Summersburger! I was sooo close to winning him and pwning his points. Damn.

2007-03-06T18:49:00.000+08:00

It's been quite a period of time since I had such a packed holiday.

It was kinda disappointing for Grand Prix: Singapore. I did average, going 4 win 4 lose - bad deck choice and opponent's good draws. At the very least, it was quite a fun experience - saw the forumers for the first time, met up with old friends and made new ones.

I was paired against players from all over globe - thankfully, no obnoxious ones. Had a difficult time with Hongkongers due to their native language being Cantonese. Well, I can speak coherent Mandarin, but Cantonese on the other hand...

Well, sign language works for both parties though. That was how a friend interacted with a Japanese player. Ever witness a Japanese casting Cabal Therapy on a Hong Konger? ZOMG LOLOLOL

Anyway, Japanese guy aren't as good looking as I imagined. Though, there was two good looking Japanese at the scene. Mmm... (uhh, nvm.)

As expected, after the dust have settled, there were no Singaporeans in the top 8. In the end, the French took the cup home.

Anyway, congratulation to two friends who walked off a thousand dollars richer.

As for me, I top 8-ed a small legacy event on day 2 and won sixty dollars. Not that bad, but it could have been better.

Right after my event, I headed straight to my class chalet, in which, I will blog about in the next post.

2007-03-01T23:14:00.000+08:00

The anticipated bi-annual event is only a day away!

3rd March - Grand Prix: Singapore

Two extended seasons in a row is as rare as...

as rare as...

as rare as HAVING TWO SEVENTH MONTH IN A YEAR ZOMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(okay, that was a bit too much on the exclamation marks.)

A prize payout of US$30,000 and free sixteen tickets to Pro Tour: Yokohama. It's no wonder people are flying over from all over the globe to compete.

I would love to be paired against Japanese players (preferably girls), unlike most of the locals.

Then, I'll pepper my dialogues with words like...

Iyaa!

Itai!

Onegai!

And most importantly, the sacred...

YAMETE!

Let's piece those words together.

Iyaaa... Itai! Onegai yamete!

And boy, am I feeling so excited! (from the event, of course.)

2007-02-28T02:33:00.000+08:00

And so, today I was confronted.

As mention from my previous post, I kept silent and overlook the card. She doesn't seem to recognize all the subtle hints I've been throwing at her time after time. Maybe I should cut some slack, considering she's a female. Female species are dense and plain stupid as compared to the superior male.

She invited me to catch a movie with her church friends once. And of course, you know, girls gossip. Their impression of me is of someone that is cool and quiet, someone whose feelings are unpredictable.

Well, they are not the first to say that. I have my opponents telling me that too. I mean, when playing Magic, you have to keep a poker face to prevent your opponent from reading your moves. Same applies to poker, duh. Perhaps, this is one of the subconscious side-effect of playing competitive Magic. But after getting to know me better, you will find them I am, you know, quite the nut. Okay okay, from now, I shall just keep quiet, stare across the distance wistfully and look pretty.

Back to topic, her friend hinted slight interest in me, and I replied that I wouldn't mind dating that girl out.

(No really, I wouldn't mind getting to know someone better. She's quite friendly, bubbly and a bit above average looking.)

That's one supposely subtle hint I used.

And after more reasoning, hints and cold-spiked statements. It finally boils down to me this.

"Thank you for your feelings. Unfortunately, I am not able(or should I say willing) to return them. I see you as a friend not as someone with romantic notions."

Gawd, that finally worked. Now I finally understand your feelings, Aly. Ha! It's no wonder, you get stressed at times. You're too kind-hearted, just like me, of course.

Moral: Just get straight to the point and quit beating the bush.

2007-02-25T23:25:00.000+08:00

Few days back, I went out with a couple of friends. One of them was telling me about how she wrote e-mail on her feelings, deciding to send it on Valentine day. But in the end, she deleted it. I simply told her that a hand-written card appears more sincere.

The guys then went to play arcade. After which, she gave me a card - confessing she liked me for two years and if I would accept her. And my answer was...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

Obviously not.

I am always giving ideas on how to reject people's advances. But at that situation, I was taciturn and ignored her. When I reject a girl, I'll probably reply 'thank you for your feelings' or 'sorry'. Simple as that.

But then, I always wanted to say...

As Elaine's chevalier, I exist only for her alone. *dramatic music cues*

or maybe...

I have no voice. Elaine is the queen of my heart. *dramatic music cues*

or...Okay nevermind, I shall not bore you with more hopeless romantic statements.

2007-02-20T02:17:00.000+08:00

I completed Blood+ yesterday. Definitely a great series!

It has superb character development. And that is one of the most important criteria in any story. I mean, your characters can't be exactly the same from the beginning of the story till the end, right? You can certainly see the change in most of the characters in Blood +. Sometimes, I really wish to hit such a standard if I ever write a novel. Characters that stay with you. Characters that you can feel.

Other factors that contribute to this series are the... compelling storyline, amazing animation, and the opening/ending songs. Especially: End1 and Open3. The lyrics, congruous. Simply love them.

Maybe the producers of Faith/Stay Knight and HAHIRU can make a movie out of it.

...lolololololol...

Moses will get what I am talking about. Inner joke. *cough cough*

Let's see. If I am the producer. "Kyon" can be Riku. "Archer" can be Haji the chevalier. And "SHITrou" can be the chiropteras. No make-up or fancy monster costumes needed!

***************

I chanced upon a picture of a Singaporean woman cosplaying as Saya from Blood+.

Definition of cosplay by Clement's dictionary: People who REALLY have too much time at hand. They use this time to dress up as their favourite characters from animes, games, or movies. Most cosplayers CMI(cannot make it) See: Singaporean cosplayers.

But I should really stop in case I get beaten. Quite a number of my friends do it, and one girl friend of mine kept pestering about how wonderful I look if I do cosplay. Well, my slightly feminine facial features are quite suitable for cosplay. It's just that no one really notice it due to my overpowering aura of manliness.

Anyway, here's the picture of the Singapore Saya. Kudos to your well-made katana and your piercing glare.

2007-02-18T22:59:00.000+08:00

Happy New year, everyone!

It's that time of the year again. If not for the money, I would dread Chinese New Year. It's incredibly boring to me at the very least.

In my entire existence, I always wished that I was 1.8M. And I stopped growing when I was 17. CURSE MY SHORT GENES! My dad is like 163cm and my mum, 160cm.

Most of my cousins(on the maternal side) are either same height or taller than me. And speaking about height, I chanced upon Daniel's brother. (You know, Daniel from our primary school, Shalyn?) He is like, 180++ and he's only 15 or 16. The same damn tall genes as his aquatic brother. GAH! I hate being short.

Regretted not playing Basketball during days of puberty.

(And going sauna once a week.)

Hong bao isn't bountiful either. But don't worry, I'll be visiting you guys soon.

Apparently, Clement seem to be t3h gay haxxorz in gambling. My relatives play small when they gamble, say $1 or $2 per game. And I walked off $50 dollars richer with just four games...lololol.

2007-02-16T17:04:00.000+08:00

For countless nights you visit me,
Haunting echoes of my past,
Teasing me of my failures.

Your dark raven hair,
Your fair flawless skin,
Your thick eyelashes,
Your bright lucid eyes,
Your rosebud of lips,

Merciless torment.

How strange your grip over my heart,
How I wish to see you again,
To compare contrast from the start,
To hear your laughter again,

(probably about my long unkempt hair, and laugh at your atrocious dress sense.)

2007-02-07T20:29:00.000+08:00

For a person who doesn't do tutorials or listen to lecture, last minute revision is the important point of time for a slacker. And this semester, I am seriously pushing the limits. It's only two more days before my final examinations and all I did was ... sieve through my notes?

If I have been praying more often, I would have felt at ease. But currently, the season is the cold, harsh winter and prayers were minimal to the point of before meals prayer and night-time prayer. *sigh*

Do pray for me, every single syllabus appreciated.

(And let me know if you do, it makes me feel better at the very least.)

And for some strange reasons, I am aiming a B for this most hopeless semester.

***************

Due to three pimples(Oh, how I hate them!) on my face, I haven't been shaving for ... five days.

With all that coarse dark hair, my chin feels so bristly. Rugged manliness. heh.

2007-02-04T19:01:00.000+08:00

You know all those character quiz all over net? I took one of those just now - which evil villian are you?

I got Doctor Doom! Powerful and intelligent yet burden with vanity.

HAHA! What kind of bullshit is that? His Excellency is not one bit vain at all.

***************

Violent pornography.

What an interesting name for a ... song. Yes, you heard it right. There is a song called ... Violent pornography.

I read the lyrics. Nothing special about it. I haven't listen to it yet. So if you have violent pornography, do send it to me.

(omg, that sounds wrong.)

Quotes from a friend on this most likely misconstrued song title.

1. Yes, I am downloading Violent Pornography now.

2. Isn't Violent Pornography just great?

3. The makers of Violent Pornography are uniquely gifted.

4. Violent Pornography just rocks my world.

5. I vote Violent Pornography as most unique artistic expression of the decade.

6. I bought Violent Pornography cheap today.

7. Shut up! I'm trying to listen to Violent Pornography here!

8. Great works of art such as Violent Pornography have constantly redifined human capacity for artistic appreciation...

9. Violent Pornograhpy: Live in Concert

10. Yes, we are performing Violent Pornography today.

Adding one of my own to this list. I love violent pornography. Do you?

2007-02-02T23:42:00.000+08:00

Taken some pictures with my tutorial group a couple of days ago. I am only posting those pictures with a clearer view of me inside, of course.

(and partly because my class has no eye candy. Nothing interesting to see.)

And lastly, Clementsutra (by Esther)

2007-01-27T00:37:00.000+08:00

It's been quite some time since I wrote a faith-related post.

Unlike Fonz's blog. 99.999% of his post being something spiritual - making me look like a complete christian failure.

When I was cute little boy (still cute though), I used to ask my mother questions like...

What is God?
Why did God created us?
Who created God? Did he hatch from an egg? Who created the egg then?

"God is God. No one created Him because He is God. He created us because He love us."

I remembered her answers till this very day. And I wasn't satisfied.

One day...you know... I would like to get married... settle down and have children...

Karma is a funny thing, and I might find myself in the same situation. But fret not! His Excellency has the answer for his future son, and he's going to share it with you.

QNS: What is God? Why did God created us?

ANS: God is a collective conscious from another plane of existence. It is relatively unknown on why He created us, but daddy guess He did it out of boredom - the same way you draw those ... things you draw. Now, if you be a good boy, you can enter Heaven and ask God one day.

QNS: Who created God?

ANS: Firstly, remember our law of physics do not confound to God. For us mortals, time is linear. But to God, daddy suspect time is a circle. There is no real beginning, no real end. He's the Alpha and the Omega. He's just there. Now, if you be a good boy, you can enter Heaven and ask God one day.

2007-01-22T23:42:00.000+08:00

I was made to do this assigment for my WISP module...

Write a short report on Singapore in the year 2030.

As usual, everyone will be *yawn* writing an optimistic-sounding report on future Singapore.

I have close-to-zero hope for my beloved country, and my report reveals it all. Not much effort was put into it though.

***************

My Vision of Singapore in 2030

Singapore in 2030 would be very different from the Singapore we know now.

Its people's complacency has lead to its decline. With China becoming a super power, together with several bigger and rising Asian countries, they overtook a large part of the world's economy. With these factors, Singapore was forced to step down from its position of being one of the most affluent Asian countries. It stopped venturing into the manufacturing industries, and pivoted most of its focus into trading.

Singapore is still governed by the PAP, instead of that local driver who constantly grumbles on how useless the government is. Several parties have come close to winning the election, but the majority still believes that PAP would lead Singapore back to its formal halcyon.

Singapore may have dropped economically-wise, but standard of living is still good, and technology being state-of-art. Hand phones are close to obsolete. Watches that serve a dual function of a contacting device are more popular. Highly-advanced and intelligent robots have replaced workers doing menial chores. It's common for each household to own an integrated computer system, and wealthier citizens may even own an android maid! A snap of the fingers and your light turns on immediately. People walk about the household with a master remote control. Android maid does all the other house work such as cleaning, cooking etc. Pollution is no longer a problem with the new anti-pollution technologies, and water being a less of a hassle due to direct supplies from Indonesia. Singapore maintained its clean and green status and lives up to its name of 'garden city'.

With all its technology, the citizen of Singapore grew lazier and unhealthier, leading to the rise in demand of the medical industries - and the drop in quality sportsman. (Not to mention, citizens becoming more... aesthetically-challenged.)

Quite a number of its people have migrated in search of greener fields, leaving the country with an aging population. The declivity in birth rates plunged even further. In a desperate attempt to boost its population size, the government attracted more foreigners to the country which lead to a friction among locals and foreigners. Productivity is still good, but not like what it was in the past.

In all, Singapore's future seems bleak for the years to come.

2007-01-19T19:59:00.000+08:00

Servant Archer. I ask you, are you my master?

Apparently, I have some skill with the bow. Without any instructions, experience, or meticulous calculation, I pulled taut the bowstring and fired.

Bull's eye.

Fire.

Bull's eye AGAIN!

The guy proceeded to ask whether I learnt Archery before.

I should have chanted, "I am the bone of my sword." before firing.

***************

I entered a room full of STC girls. And my mind simply screamed, "Welcome to Butchland"

Okay okay, I shall not be mean. It's the school culture, I guess. At least, there are modicum of feminine-looking ones. A small glimmer of hope.

Alyssa and I have some kind of communication problem.

She said a bus will be taking her back. I said, "Okay, I'll go off first then." And went straight home.

She was expecting me to wait for her...

You should have clarify first, tsk tsk. I would have send you to MRT station, dumb ass.

PS: Did any of your classmate asked, "who is that guy?"

2007-01-16T00:48:00.000+08:00

Guess what, people.

I coloured my hair today. And I'll leave it to your imagination on how it looks like.

A cookie to the person who guessed the correct color.

***************

Drama to watch: My boss, my hero at www.crunchyroll.com

Incredibly funny J-drama. I am currently on episode four.

2007-01-14T23:57:00.000+08:00

A statement like, 'I could even count the fries!' is considered an insult to any good western cuisine outlet.

Serving portions of fries that could be counted WITH FIVE FINGERS is ...

G-O-O-D G-A-M-E.

The Pizza Place have been in Jurong Point for several centuries. And it was only today, that I accepted her offer. Yes, it was my virgin time. But...

the five pieces of fries was a 'turn off'.

At the very least, the pizza is good. Better than that monopolistic Pizza Hut.

***************

I tried the Macdonald's prosperity meal too! I like it. But the bun could get soggy with that copious amount of black pepper sauce. I took the wedges, of course.

Macdonald's Twister fries and potato wedges >>> Normal macdonald fries

Carl junior's Criss cross fries >>> Normal macdonald fries

Long John Silver's fries >>> Normal macdonald fries

Meh, I still long for A&W's curly fries.

2007-01-13T01:25:00.000+08:00

I love neko mimi meido!

Cat-ears hairband and french maid outfit FTW.

Call me ... Goshujin-sama.

2007-01-10T19:56:00.000+08:00

I just got back from my Napfa. Guess what.

Let me describe my stations, starting from the best.

Pull-up: A+
Hit eleven pull-up and you get yourself an A. Just for the sheer reason of showing off, I did a total of thirteen pull-ups, beating the second highest record of well, eleven. To me, thirteen pull-ups is cake-walk. At the zenith of my physical fitness, I could do a total of eighteen (but I decided to conserve my strength for 2.4km).

Sit-up: A+
The strange thing about sit-up is that, the older you are, the less is required out of you. I was begging Gregory to help me cheat, but I guess that wasn't necessary after all. I did 43 sit-ups in 40 seconds, and I just laid on the floor doing nothing for the next 20 seconds. LOLOLOL. The trainer was staring me with the 'WTF?' face.

And the strange thing is that, once I did an aerobic session and my Abs took a trip to hell and back - my sister did three of those sessions and didn't complain one bit.

My sister's Abs = power.

Shuttle-run: Gold
I predicted I was going fail miserably at this station. Well, I guess I make a lousy prophet, clocking 10.03 seconds. But all thanks goes to Gregory for being my pacer, clocking 9 seconds plus.

The key point is on how to snatch up those wooden blocks. I did stumble a bit on that point. Side note: Clement runs the fastest when he's chasing after a bus.

Sit and reach: Silver
I didn't stretch hard enough at this station, but I did relatively well, considering how much I suck in stretching. My leg muscles are very tense and stiff. Ask my sister.

Standing broad jump: Pwn3d n00b status
Clement's prophetic talents unveils! He failed, as predicted. The first went an all time high score of 220cm (but my palm slipped and touched 170cm. GG) The second one was atrocious.

2.4KM run: conceded
At first, I was pacing Gregory at an equal speed - finishing my third round in five minutes. Maintaining this pace will earn me 10 minutes plus, but that's as impossible as Clement getting a girlfriend. ....then

...then

...then

My abs started to hurt like fuck. It was unbearable to continue running. I walked for two rounds and conceded at the end of the fifth when it became worse and I knew it was impossible to uhh... pass. My head spun and I felt like vomitting. I wobbled all the way home.

I am not using this ailment as an excuse, but given that I didn't have those fucking stitches, my timing would have been a lousy twelve minutes. My running is terrible, even though I clocked eleven minutes during my secondary school days. Maybe Elaine's suggestion of placing a pretty girl wearing nothing but running shoes in front of me would have work wonderfully. Like really.

To wrap it all up, I failed.

Yes, I failed.

Gotta retake the bloody Napfa. RAHHH!!!

2007-01-09T00:00:00.000+08:00

I ate pepper lunch yesterday and today. So shiok!

For your information, Pepper lunch is one of my favourite restaurants.

I tried the curry beef set today. It's not bad, but my advice is...

Take the original beef pepper lunch set, as always. The cheapest, and the most delicious. =)

(although I always wanted to try the hamburger steak, but no $$$...)

They are not paying me to do an advertisment, but I can say that...

Pepperlunch is really yummy! If you haven't tried it, you don't know what you're missing out in life. (same can be said to girls who do not know me)

2007-01-07T23:34:00.000+08:00

I've been quite busy rushing projects/doing surveys recently. And even if I am not, I'll still be too lazy to exercise.

Yes, my Napfa is this week, wednesday.

And I am totally unprepared for it.

Pull-up = 5
Sit up = 5 (plan to cheat)
2.4km = probably 3
Sit and reach = horrible
Shuttle run = Should be horrible too
Standing broad jump = GG

If only I could get a mere two for standing broad jump. Please pray for me. I don't want to go NS early.

2007-01-05T23:59:00.000+08:00

A classmate called me the F word today. =(

All I did was try on my girl__friend's thick and pink spectacles, and there she went...

"Oh my god, Clement! You look so F..FEMININE!!!"

"You're just like a girl!"

(and other blasphemous comments which I shall not mention)

I have always viewed Elaine as abnormal. Because she is the only person in this universe that says I am 'girly' for some obscure reasons. Uhh, which part? Other than my waist.

Well, I guess I know another weirdo now.

Sidenote: I don't mind being called bishounen though.

2007-01-02T00:12:00.000+08:00

A new year devoid of hope has arrived! Armaggedon is upon us!

MAY SEX, VIOLENCE, GLUTTONY, DRUGS, AND ALCOHOL TAKE US ALL AND DESICCATE US.

(especially sex)

***************

Went to watch Death Note II with my secondary school friends today. It's a good show, worth all its hype.

What I cannot forgive is that...

A Misa Buffet all spread out in front of him, and Kira just brush it off as if it's nothing.

...omg wtf? I'll help myself to a Misa Buffet anyday.

He seemed to have an unhealthy obsession with L too.

Ewww...yaoi.

2006-12-31T18:38:00.000+08:00

Recap on this year events...

Significant events: None... from what I recall.

***************

I have no New Year resolution for this time.

It's going to be the most depressive year for me.

1) The high level of stress awaiting at the end of the marketing semester.

2) I turn twenty. Omg, I am 1/5 of a century old. No longer a teen.

3) National Service. *coughPesAcough*

I am not expecting anything, not looking forward to anything. Well maybe, some time to improve on my terrible english.

It's going to be a *take a deep breath*

bleak, daunting, dejecting, depressive, discouraging, disheartening, dismal, dispiriting, distressing, dreary, funereal, gloomy, hopeless, joyless, melancholic, mournful, oppressive, saddening, somber, upsetting, cheerless, colorless, comfortless, damp, dismal, dispiriting, doleful, downcast, drab, dull, forlorn, glum, lifeless, routine, sorrowful, tedious, uneventful, uninteresting, wearisome, windy, wintry, wretched, bereaved, bitter, blue, despondent, disconsolate, grief-stricken, heavy-hearted, hurting, in doldrums*, languishing, low-spirited, lugubrious, morose, pensive, pessimistic, somber, sorrowful, sorry, troubled, weeping, wistful, woebegone

...YEAR.

(To sum my whole post, I am pessimistic about this year)

2006-12-28T00:15:00.000+08:00

Moses passed me 'Ouran High school host club' a couple of months ago, and it was only yesterday that I completed watching it.

It was because I thought it was a yaoi series and decided to give it a miss for the time being. Watched the first ten minutes and my brain can't help but scream, "Omg cat-ear boy rape."

Sorry, I was traumatized by mind-scarring homosexual slash porn fanfiction written by rabid yaoi fangirls. Oh, fear the flames of Moe!

Anyway, I decided to give it another chance when my friend said it was a good series - appealing to both gender. I like the main character. Her mannerism reminded me of someone special. Ahhh... such a melancholic nostalgic feeling. =(

...

Such a pity the fandom of Ouran High School at fanfiction.net is dominated by yaoi-loving girls.

lol, gotta love the pink words(and the heart) in the background.

2006-12-23T23:45:00.000+08:00

For those who offered to do up my pathetic blog, thank you - but no thanks. That task is reserved for Moses (bloody free now) whom I am giving a very small gift token as christmas present. Our relationship compromise of no presents no frills, we understand that it's the thought that counts - like say... five powerful black rares. And if I am coerced to give him a present, an ang bao would be best as it would spare both parties the agony.

(So for the rest, you still have to get me a present.)

***************

Don't you think that Christmas is over-commercialized?

I mean... my non-christian friends are partying wayyy harder than me. They are going clubbing, parties, group gatherings, singing christmas songs, and God knows whatever they do.

Which is basically, plain wrong.

I don't see myself going, "OMG, it's vesak day. Happy holidays, minna!!! Let's party!" Same goes to Hari raya, Deepavali etc.

Nothing to celebrate about if you do not know what's the true meaning of Christmas.

(which is receiving presents, of course)

Uhh I meant, the birth of Jesus who came to save the world. Amen.

2006-12-21T13:30:00.000+08:00

It's the pink candle, and I don't feel very christmas-sy this season, due to workload. Instead, I feel depressive and down.

*sigh*

The only good thing that happened that I am no longer the main character in the play! HOOO! They made me the father and the lightman. What in the world were they thinking in the first place to cast me into that role!

Oh yah, haven't gone for confession too! =(

***************

Here's my Christmas wantlist, if anyone is interested of getting me a present.

6) OMG JAV LOLOL

5) 'Shock' lands, 'Dual' lands

4) A new blogskin

3) Digital camera

2) Handphone (preferably Nokia)

1) French maid (two would be a good number)

Jolin told me the outfit is rather expensive. But you can often find girls dressing up as one at any Singapore cosplay events.

Point aside, I would like one that submits to my every bidding, such as helping my mother do the housework. Must be able to cook well too.

2006-12-19T12:06:00.000+08:00

I had a horrifyingly, humorous nightmare today. I won't tell much about it, because it's quite personal, but it involves my friends blocking traffic and stopping cars, while I crash into the main wedding held at a church, bash the groom with a baseball bat and steal the bride away.

By the way, part of the reason is because I don't like the groom, not because I wanted the bride for myself.

***************

Yesterday's trip to VivoCity was rather ... interesting - it was like my third time to Vivocity in a short span of one week!

I was shopping for Christmas presents, and I came across this shop that sells only soft toys. It was quite a dumb but memorable experience buying a custom-made teddy bear from there - my friend and I couldn't stop laughing.

Step 1: Choose a skin. Nothing special.

***

Step 2: Choose a sound that it'll make. None of those sounds appeal to me. No roaring or something like that. I could do a voice recording ... for a price though. Maybe making the bear go...

"Onegai yamete..."

"Don't squeeze me."

"You're a dumbass. Amen"

"KNN... CCB"

The possibilities are endless. But I settled for a retarded sound out of fun. (more on that later)

***

Step 3: Hand stuff the doll with wool. Then I was made to do stupid things like: kissing a heart, whisper the person's name, put it between your palms and make a wish, then pass it to salesgirl who would proceed to fluff the bear up with wool and put the heart into it, before sewing it up. Oh wow, the bear now have a piece of me in it. *roll eyes*

***

Step 4: The bear is placed on the platform, where pressurized air will be blown at it when you step the pedal. I brushed the bear meticulously.

***

Step 5: Choosing clothes for the bear. I told the salesgirl I preferred her naked. She stared at me in a strange manner. She tried to convince me otherwise, but I still preferred her naked. Yeah, the salesgirl was kinda cute. She's 16 by the way. The actual reason was that, the clothes prices were daylight robbery.

***

Step 6: Naming session. It was a girl bear, so they added pink ribbons to it. I named the bear Clementine... and the same salesgirl was constantly ...uhhh disturbing me.

***

Step 7: Payment. It was then that I bloody realized that the bloody sounds wasn't bloody free, and I paid six bloody dollars for it.

***************

(In case you're curious, the bear makes mewling noises. LOL)

2006-12-17T00:30:00.000+08:00

My friend describe my character as Green White. (Magic term, of course.)

Straightforward, prudent, yet elegant.

***************

On my way back home, I met a friend of mine by coincident. She reprimanded me for not appearing earlier, if not, she could have introduced her girl friend to me. Of course, me being cheeky as usual asked if that friend was pretty. She said,"Of course." ...Damn!

This friend of mine, she's my type of girl.

Intellectual, friendly, quick to smile, above-average looking, and a sharp witty tongue. I often find myself laughing with her.

I don't like her in that special way, but still, I was fairly disappointed to find out she's attached - she's going home with her boyfriend, mind you. Well, if she's single, I wouldn't mind if she chase me.

So, I was wondering how much it would hurt me if the girl I loved was attached to another guy.

2006-12-13T22:30:00.000+08:00

Recap.

I went for church rally at Risen Christ church on monday. It isn't a youth event, so it's kinda refreshing to see old folks joining us in worship - regretted not bringing Moses, Gregory or Alyssa there. At one point of worship, there was this part where young ladies dressed in white dresses and halos entered, singing and crashing their uhh...what's that called....uhh...tamborines. They also had this simple, catchy korean praise song...lol. We must have look retarded doing those actions, but since the whole church is doing it, it wasn't that bad.

Quite a good experience if I wasn't hungry and tired. While Elaine was happily feasting, the insides of my empty stomach were gnawing me out incessantly, pushing me to the brink of unconsciousness. *sigh*

Elaine doesn't care about me. =(

***************

Tuesday

Medical check-up!

Until this day, I do not understand the 'cough' check-up.

I was told to strip off my shorts and underwear - *blush* s0 tAoYaN naRhx.

Hold my mouth and cough. I misheard it as 'hold my balls and cough.'

Thankfully, he was polite enough not to comment on my balls of steel. Okay never mind, ignore that.

Anyway, I was posted to Pes A. WTF!!!

Pes A is like the fittest class you can ever get. Most of my other friends are Pes B lor.

I am prepared for sai kang liao. Commando, anyone?

Even if I am not posted to commando, I'll get stuff like combat marshal and all those tough jobs that requires you to go and die prematurely.

I am sooo dead. (puns intended)

2006-12-09T21:50:00.000+08:00

So... that's what the thing about...

I received a call from Hendri and Laura, asking me to report at St. Francis for some christmas stuff.

Guess what. I was supposed to act some main character in the Christmas Eve role-play, together with our class yandao, Andrew. No wonder Aly....uhhh...okay nvm.

What's with them putting me as one of the main "star" *sigh* Not to mention, a rather depressive character. And the plot was kinda bad, but please don't tell Tescelyn that.

***************

On my way home, this uncle was looking at me... non-stop ... throughout the whole bloody bus journey. It was so damn obvious lor. Stare stare stare like no one else's business.

If you're a girl or something, I would have regard it as a compliment. But when you're a 40 plus uncle, I felt mentally violated.

An uncle once asked my younger guy friend whether he wanna suck suck lick lick ... his thing. And we were making fun of him about it yesterday.

If that ever happens to me, I won't be surprised if I bash him up.

Oh, the horrors!!!